Slimy Creatures & the Political Race


Slimy Creatures & the Political Race

(Yes, there is a difference)

by Amy Lignor


It is not a happy thought to even speak about politics in America at this moment. Especially when most voters are standing back, watching, wondering when someone will appear and say the joke is over and here are your actual candidates. Trying to debate or justify anything lately is more than a bit difficult; therefore, let us use an easier way to describe what is being seen on a daily basis.
politics in America, honoring the presidents, politics and insects, named after a bugLibraries, high schools…most president’s love to hear that their name has been attached to an organization of learning. Of course, if you’re a really great President you get a whole town named after you. But what happens in the 21st Century? These supposed “public service” figures are actually being named after bugs.


Now, don’t get this statement wrong. There are some who are thrilled to be named after a “lowly” species. Why is that? Because it was actually an honor granted unto them. Take Al Gore, for instance. This is the man who turned his back on The White House (when he actually should have been taking up residence) and decided to help the world, the wildlife, and stop the growing carbon footprint (earning an Academy Award while doing so.) For his great work, he actually has a praying mantis that was discovered near the Amazon in Peru named after him. This incredible find, apparently, was one of 19 new species of mantis found and was announced as a bestowment of honor for Gore’s passionate environmental work.


Even the most recent, an orange-covered lichen, was named after current President Barack Obama. Where some might see this as a smack in the face, it was actually bestowed by Kerry Knudsen, the lichen curator (yes, there are those) working in the University of California, Riverside Herbarium. She picked the name to show her appreciation for the president’s support of science and science education. But Obama was not just given one. Over at Auburn University, entomologist Jason Bond discovered a new species of trapdoor spider and named it after the President saying, “It’s difficult for me to envision a higher honor. In science, there are few things that we do as scientists that has the permanency that taxonomy does.”


There are other “honors” however that seem far more fitting when it comes to the office of the president, as well as his significant others. Take George W. Bush, for instance. Three species of slime-mold beetles, discovered in 2005 by entomologists Quentin Wheeler and Kelly B. Miller, were then named by said scientists after George W. Bush, his V.P., and his Secretary of Defense. Considering history, a triad of slime-mold creatures seems an exact fit for that particular trio. One of the entomologists, however, stated that he named them after the specific politicians because they: “have the courage of their convictions and are willing to do the very difficult and unpopular work of living up to principles of freedom and democracy rather than accepting the expedient or popular.” Bush called to thank him for the “honor.” It would be interesting to see how many people reading this would have thought the same thing…


From plants to animals to fungi, people in political power have a great many creatures that are being named after them, and although no one has stated what organism would best suit a female President Clinton, the talk of what would best represent Trump is all abuzz.


A butterfly is most likely out of the running, although there is a skeletal moth that can bring disease to many, so that species stays in the game. But the closest in resemblance has most definitely already been discovered. A flannel moth caterpillar is out there who has recently landed some headlines for its uncanny likeness to, what else? Trump’s blondish/orange pseudo comb-over. Cute, fuzzy…yet this is one species that fools quite easily. You see, under all that fuzziness the creature is actually covered in poisonous barbs that cause humans and other animals excruciating pain, along with nausea, vomiting, and shock. After-effects that many are stating (even the Republican Party after having meetings on whether or not to stand behind their candidate 100%) Trump produces in buckets when opening his mouth.


So…what is the best namesake for a bug, you ask? Only the most popular this year (as well other pervious decades). A beetle (Agathidium vaderi) was discovered with a broad shiny head and odd, glasslike eyes. Who does he remind one of? The evil Star Wars lord, Darth Vader. Too bad that man in black is fiction, otherwise Trump could be buried with a simple Jedi trick and the rest of us could breathe a sigh of relief as we see, unveiled for the first time, the actual candidates to run the country.


A soul can dream…


Source:  Baret News