Snooki, the pint-sized star, of Jersey Shore fame has penned her first novel, “A Shore Thing.” Although no reviewer worth his salt has compared Snooki to Shakespeare, the reality star`s tome does contain nuggets like these:
“Any juicehead will get some nut shrinkage. And acne. They fly into a `roid rage, it is a `road` `roid rage.”
“He had an okay body. Not fat at all. And naturally toned abs. She could pour a shot of tequila down his belly and slurp it out of his navel without getting splashed in the face.”
“Gia danced around a little, shaking her peaches for show. She shook it hard. Too hard. In the middle of a shimmy, her stomach cramped. A fart slipped out. A loud one. And stinky.”
It looks like Snooki actually wrote her novel, any ghostwriter who penned literary pearls like these wouldn`t be hired by any aspiring novelist.
Sarah Palin, the reality star and wannabe president, has penned her second book, “America by Heart: Reflections on Family, Faith and Flag.” Palin`s ghostwritten book contains such trite and divisive passages like these:
“Freedom is never more than one generation away from extinction. We didn`t pass it to our children in the bloodstream. It must be fought for, protected, and handed on for them to do the same, or one day we will spend our sunset years telling our children and our children`s children what it was once like in the United States when men were free.”
“Still, I don`t think it`s an accident that the opponents of this new American awakening so often accuse Tea Partiers and others of being racist. For one thing, it`s a guaranteed conversation stopper. Just saying the word racist instantly ends any legitimate debate. Just the accusation gives the accuser an excuse not to debate the issues at hand.”
Judyth Piazza the CEO and managing editor of TheSOP.Org will soon release her new book:
“Judyth`s book will include select items from her years of work in media, like her interviews with her guests on The American Perspective, along with the healthy activities in her own life such as her exercise and fitness routine. Currently, the title of the book is a tightly kept secret and rumor has it that it is going to be a sample from Judyth`s exciting life and career, including testimonials and quotes about her achievements. The book will be published by Von Chase Publishing with a foreword written by the publisher, Chase Von.” http://staugnews.com/2011/02/17/judyth-piazza-creator-of-thesop-radio-network-now-to-emerge-as-an-author.html
Unlike Snooki and Sarah Palin, Judyth isn`t a reality star, she`s a renowned journalist and a celebrated radio talk show host. You won`t find Snooki-like paragraphs like this one in Judyth`s book:
“I was so excited when I was interviewing Brad Pitt that I let loose a fart of epic proportions, but I relied on my professionalism to get me out of the stinky mess. I explained to my radio audience that we were having audio difficulties. Brad is handsome, but he`s a complete dunce, he actually fell for my explanation.”
Nor will you find any trite Sarah Pain like passages like this one in Judyth`s book:
“When I`m writing an essay or interviewing a guest I feel the love of Jesus flowing through my veins. I`m so glad that I live in the greatest country in the world where we can fulfill our dreams and eat all the ice cream in the world.”
Judyth`s book will feature true to the heart stories and wisdom like this:
“My whole career, I think, has sort of been like that, sort of slow going but, you know, get up to pace. You got to have endurance. You`ve got to be tenacious and have endurance and, you know, you can`t let anything keep you down. You got to keep coming back.” Patrick Warburton, “Seinfeld”.
Judyth`s book will be out by the end of June!
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